In a previous blog post, I said I was dating myself. In this post, I genuinely am…by revealing my age <insert shocked face emoji with fine lines here>. Here are snippets about my life across four decades and change.
- As a Valentine's Day baby, I ruined the holiday for my mother (I learned this at 41).
- If I tweeze my eyebrows, I sneeze minimally four times in a row.
- I have a baby tooth that never fell out, so the Tooth Fairy owes me a dollar plus inflation.
- I don't have a college degree, but I'm three degrees separated from Kevin Bacon.
- I accidentally stole a magazine from the college bookstore.
- Instead of coming clean, I put the money for the magazine in a random place upon my next visit.
- I know this was for naught, but that is how I dealt with the situation…25 years ago.
- I once worked security at a NASCAR event at the age of 16.
- I didn't allow a top TV announcer into our Media Center, and he moved me out of the way to get inside to interview Dale Earnhardt.
- The guy was doing his job, and I was doing mine.
- Throughout my childhood, my mom not only gave up Valentine's Day but let me have cheesecake for my birthday.
- I rarely eat cheesecake as an adult.
- I loved and ate Fettucine Alfredo often as a child, but got scared straight when it was labeled “heart attack on a plate.”
- At 40, I learned that my sister was paid $100 to take me to my first New Kids on the Block concert.
- My sister informed me that she would charge well over a $1000 to go to a New Kids on the Block concert with me now.
- At the age of five, I kicked my adult neighbor in the shin when she told me I looked cute in my bikini.
- I Silly String'd my childhood dog and had to cut all of the evidence out of his fur when it dried.
- I was an a$$hole as a child.
- Growing up, whenever we played “Goonies” with friends, I was “Sloth.”
- At 15, I was afraid of getting contacts because I thought I would poke my eyeballs out.
- I have contacts now, but never let my fingernails grow too long because I still don't want to poke my eyes out.
- I bit my nails until the age of 25 but quit as soon as I got my first professional job.
- Before my professional job, I was a clown, a dancing theme park character, and a waitress.
- As a waitress, I hated it when• guests would leave dirty diapers behind on the table.
- Seriously…who does that?
- To this day, due to my past as a server, I still tip 20% even when service isn't sniffing at lackluster.
- I don't consider Disney lackluster as I have been so many times that I've lost count.
- I was denied a kiss during a “Kiss Cam” moment at an NBA game.
- I was married to the guy at the time.
- We are super duper divorced.
- My father was a Burger King Franchisee.
- I joke that instead of a silver spoon I was born with a Whopper in my mouth.
- I just told my fiancé the name of this blog post.
- He responded, “You're 43, so that makes me 44?”
- When I responded in the affirmative, he kicked his leg in the air and said, “YEAH…I thought I was 45!”
- I do what I can to keep the man happy.
- I slept with covers over my head until the age of 11 due to my fear of the Boogeyman.
- I used to “Polar Bear” at my parent's camp in Maine as a teenager.
- I now live in Florida, so when I visit Maine during cold weather (60º), I look like the younger brother all dressed up in winter clothing from A Christmas Story.
- My favorite shops are Amazon, Etsy, Anthropologie and local home goods shops.
- The # of Amazon orders I make each year grows between 10% to 25%.
- I'm pretty sure the UPS guy thinks I never leave the house.
- If you are still reading this, you are loyal and I think I love you.
Does this remind you a bit of the “25 Things You Don't Know About Me” that US Magazine publishes? Yeah…me, too…
I would love to learn more about all of you! If you would kindly leave a couple of sentences (or as many as you would like to share) in the comments that would be oh so rad.
Work Hard. Play Hard. Drink Chard.